Daddy issues :)

Let’s face it. Most of us have daddy issues. Our dad was “too strict, too distant, he spanked me, etc. etc.” Some cases are more extreme than others, but I have yet to meet someone who did not have issues with their father.

Okay, Charlie, true, but why bring this up on Father’s Day? Last night I called my dad and wished him a Happy Father’s Day. I took the time to thank my dad. When he was a young man, working long hours and struggling to get ahead he did some things that changed my life and have echoed through succeeding generations. He made sure I knew how to read. My dad was dyslexic and this was a struggle for him his whole life. But I had a library card at a young age and could read before I went to kindergarten.

He made sure I knew math, including the multiplication tables up to the 12s, a skill that is somehow difficult to pass on! Because of this I have been able to read complicated blueprints and assist many of my clients with accounting and other issues.

He bought me my first musical instrument, a trumpet and paid for private lessons. From trumpet I graduated to French horn and played in all kinds of ensembles throughout my school years and beyond. In 1959, $10.00 or $20.00 a month was a lot of money. An excellent athlete himself, my Dad taught me how to play ball and made sure I had swim lessons.

He is an example of a person who worked hard to get ahead and has taken on life with a can do attitude. Through relationship difficulties, physical difficulties and financial setbacks he has always taken an optimistic attitude.

I’ve spent most of my life trying to please my dad and make him proud of me. Sometimes this striving has been to my detriment and last year my dad and I had some difficulties in our relationship. I had to come to terms with some of my “daddy issues.” In that process I let go of being the little boy trying to please my daddy and began to talk to him man to man and appreciate the fact that he was young once, like I was and dealt with all of the issues I have dealt with in my life.

Bryan Duncan recorded a song and released it on his latest album that talks about these kinds of issues. Today I want to pay homage to my father, Thomas Reginald Wear. He is my father and I love him.